I was on a good roll in 2019 as I stated here before. I was aware somehow to take advantage of some free time and weather. I got up early, a lot last year. I was playing around with number 5 for a while. I explored a lot, went to different places but mostly rode by myself with a few exceptions. I got a lot of my bikes out. Somedays I would ride the fat bike, others the carboner, others the fixed gear, others the track bike. I rifled thru all of my bikes and it was good.
Then in January the bottom fell out. Between Jan-Feb-March we lost 3 fathers. Three pillars to our family. That's all I want to say about this right now. I feel like everything crumbled. I completely lost interest in riding. I also lost interest in sleeping thru the night. Everything got disrupted. Then the "crisis" came and the rest is history.
I had a friends frame hanging in the garage for months, months. He had asked me to install a headset and chase the threads. Yesterday, out of the blue, I went into the garage, put the lights on and started working on it.
It was weird to touch the tools, almost on control remote with 30 years of experience. I finished the frame, then I moved on to my sons cross bike. I had promised him gravel tires and a fresher cassette. I got that done, adding some WTB nanos in 40mm. A fresh cassette, der adjust and that was done. Then I finally installed the ortlieb saddle bag on the Troll I finished building a while back.
I cleaned up the area, turned the light off and felt some satisfaction. Some satisfaction in that there is a light on the end of each tunnel, no matter how long it is.
I went upstairs and read more entries on Charlie Farrow's blog. I laughed, I cried as Charlie is a wiz with the words. I copied and pasted a paragraph to Cookie. I fell asleep thinking of those days, together with some of the best people.
I miss the Dads that we lost. I will soon commence to ride in their honor. Thank you for all you have shown me. We truly miss you guys.
thanks for reading,
Ari
Bonk King and I riding. Slender Fungus Strong. |
These are rough days for me as well, Ari. Keep your chin up, keep moving forward, no matter how slow or fast.
ReplyDeleteRiding every bike I have is a good idea. I think I will try this for 2020.